The Mutual/NBC Radio Reunion--Or, Cash Bar At Its Finest...

In a couple of weeks; broadcasters from near and far will gather at a hotel to eat, drink, mingle, talk about old times and listen to some audio memories from days gone by. Certainly not the first time that's happened in my career...and it probably won't be the last.

But major bashes like the upcoming NBC Radio/Mutual Broadcasting System reunion are special--not just because of the camaraderie, but because we'll have a chance to remember how things were "back in the day." And, for me, at least (although I'm sure others will feel similar); the rememberances will go back a long time. I'll explain, albeit in a roundabout way.

Broadcasting has changed little on the outside in the last ten years. Radio stations and formats come and go. People come and go. But it's changed exponentially on the inside. The purge of NBC/Mutual in August of 1998 was a grand example of how things were about to change industry-wide. In a nutshell; Mel Karmazin, whom you may know now runs Sirius/XM; took over NBC/Mutual and CBS Radio. Mel eventually decided he didn't need NBC/Mutual, or its staff, payroll and general overhead. So, in July of 1998; we were told, en masse, we were being let go and NBC/Mutual's operations would move to NYC, down the hall from CBS. Once those network's contractual obligations to affiliates were fulfilled; NBC and Mutual would be killed off, although that would take a while. CNNRadio would eventually pick up most of those affiliates.

A few of the NBC/MBS crew went to NYC. But literally dozens lost jobs here. Fortunately; all but a few "stragglers" landed on their feet, found other work and moved on. Interesting that, had the networks not folded; most of us might still be there today, working on double-digit anniversaries and calculating our severance.

The NBC/Mutual complex in Crystal City (near National Airport) was old by anyone's standards. While other networks had converted--or were converting--to digital media; NBC/Mutual was still all reel-to-reel and all-cart. For the uninitated, that means we were still recording on and playing back tape. Ironically; Mutual was a pioneer in computer-controlled newscasts, having gone to an automated mic and time gate decades ago. The system is common now, but was way ahead of its time then. The computer fired the theme, turned your mic on and "clipped" you if you ran over. Problem was, by the time I got there in 1995 as an anchor; they were using the same system they used in the early 80s. And it was being held together with chewing gum. And, sadly--that's the way most of the 12th floor was until the end. Hell; if it hadn't been for Norm Pattiz buying NBC Radio; we might have still been using manual typewriters and carbon paper! By the time I got there; the BASYS system hadn't been in the building all that long.

But it was a thrill to work there; a thrill to be on-the-air there; a thrill to contribute. Why?

I grew up with broadcasting. My dad, Jim Hall, was a long-time Mutual anchor and correspondent in the 60s and 70s. For his day, he was considered one of the best in the business. Not only was he a top-notch newsman, but made significant money as a voice talent. I don't say that because he was my father; that's what everyone else said about him. I grew up with that level of the business. When I was growing up; it was glamorous. And, because of who my dad "was;" I knew a lot of the heavies of the time. And, in my various stops in my career; I would run into some of them time and again.

When Jim passed away in 1990; a good deal of the "old-school" MBS people attended his memorial service. It was touching.

Mutual was a big part of my family's life. Thus, when I was hired on to anchor in 1995; I considered that a huge thrill. In the end; I made many friends there. And when we all gather in a couple of weeks; it'll be nice to see them again.

There will be some who will be missing. One who immediately comes to mind is Fred Lowery. One of the most talented radio newspeople ever. Simply the best. And one of the nicest people you would ever know. Fred held down the overnight anchor slot for 20+ years. He liked doing overnights. First; it kept him away from management. Second; it left his days free for golf. We played a lot of golf together.

Every year; Fred would take his five weeks vacation in one big lump. Fred and Ann would drive up to their little "summer place" in Norway, Maine. You can't get there from here. Every year I was at NBC/MBS; I would cover that five weeks of overnights. We wouldn't hear from Fred for five weeks. No phone, no nothing.

In July of 1998; Fred and Ann went to Maine, as they usually did. But this time, it was different. Not long into their stay; Fred became ill. The nearest hospital was nothing more than a "community hospital," with limited medical facilities. It is said Fred walked in the emergency room under his own power. But he never left. His body failed rapidly and he died of a massive infection July 26, 1998. He was only 55. He died much the same way Jim Henson of The Muppets died--a raging staph infection that, by the time doctors got to it--was uncontrollable.

When we got the call the next day--Monday morning; we were, individually and collectively, in shock. I had just gone to bed after working Fred's shift, when anchor Barbara Porter called me to tell me. I wasn't the only one who dropped what they were doing to go in and hang out after hearing the news. It was that kind of place.

Kurt Henschen is another one. Kurt was a familiar news voice on WMAL in the 70s before going to MBS. He died of ALS two years ago. We had a wake for him in May of 2006.

Ironically; I did the last-ever Mutual newscast from Crystal City. It was the 5 AM show on Sunday morning, 8/30/98. It was nothing more than luck of the schedule. Otherwise; someone else might have done it. But for me; it was apt. 35 years of family history with the network...and I'm the one who gets to shut it down.

The 6 AM newscast came out of NYC. Jim Chenevey anchored it. But I had to have a newscast ready and be in the booth, just in case.

On Monday, 8/31, we all went in for one last day to clean out our boxes and get our severance checks.

You can listen to the last MBS newscast from Crystal City here.

I'm hoping the NBC/MBS reunion is a great blowout. I hope we all have great fun. A big thank-you to Jill Nado, Judy Thomas and Rita Rich for putting this together.

I'll always remember the great time I had working there--both in high school as a tape editor and as an anchor as an adult. I know many others will feel the same way. That's because despite the problems inherent to a big broadcast news operation--translation: all the bullshit we went through; we were all made better for the experience.

Food Network: Anodyne To Civilization?

When Food Network first went on the air; I was, like, "so what?" Who's Emeril Lagasse and why does anyone care?

BAM!

These days; I can't go more than a day without watching Food Network at length. I haven't learned all that much about cooking. But I've learned a LOT about marketing.

Whomever's behind the casting and marketing of Food Network's show inventory is either a flat-out genius...or lucky. Maybe both. Emeril Lagasse. Rachael Ray. Paula Deen. Giada DeLaurentis. Ina Garten. Bobby Flay. Tyler Florence. Guy Fieri.

Boy--if I had my life to live over; my ass would be in culinary school!

I would think most of those I've mentioned--and a few others I haven't--would be doing okay without Food Network. But their day-in, day-out TV exposure has made most of them millions.

Paula Deen, for example. Started out as a single mom with $200, making bag lunches for local businesspeople. Her kids, Jamie and Bobby (now TV stars in their own right), delivered them. Paula then opened a little restaurant, which became a big restaurant. Then, her brother, Bubba (how apt), opened his own place. Licenses to print money. Then, Paula gets the Food Network gig. Ever watch her "Paula's Cooking" show? I've never seen so many Rolexes in one show! She's got one. Her husband, Michael, has one. Her kids have 'em. Paula, whose first marriage ended up in a landfill, marries Michael in a paradise setting and settles in to a quaint little place that dwarfs my entire condo building. Little vacations to the Caribbean, Paris; you get the idea. And it's all in the hard drive room at Food Network. Where's my checkbook, y'all?

Rachael Ray. Holy crap! Buyer for Macy's, right? Ends up teaching these "30 Minute Meals" courses at some community college. First cookbook goes through the roof. She's so adorable; it's hard to believe that Beef-On-Weck accent comes out of her mouth! When she was doing those "$40 A Day" shows; it was plain to see she was not just there for the shoot. Every show had a different guy. Then, she marries John Cusimano in Italy. By this time, Rachel's flush with cash. Flew 100 of her friends and relatives to the wedding and put them up! Wonder what was in the "thank you" bag? Now; Rachel's taping schedule rivals most trauma surgeon's surgical schedules. How good is that?

Giada DeLaurentis. Did Grandpa Dino get her this gig--or was he already gone by then? I'd love to see the Nielson breakouts on male viewers for "Everyday Italian." If any Food Network personality is flat-out beautiful; it's Giada. And, she can cook! Mangia!

Ina Garten. A Nice Jewish Girl who's husband just happens to be a top trial lawyer and they just happen to live in this "little place in the country" that just happens to have a full-blown restaurant kitchen. Ina does things like make Popsicles out of Martini & Rossi and freezes beef and chicken broth in cube trays for future use. I wonder if she's ever popped a couple in a glass of iced tea by mistake? I love their little lunch and dinner parties for their nearby rich friends, where they delicately slice thru the dishes she's painstakingly made from scratch. Usually; husband Michael is just getting home from work on the train and is famished. What timing. Her show's called "The Barefoot Contessa." But I swear I've never seen her barefoot!

Bobby Flay. Just once; I'd like to see Bobby make a dish WITHOUT habenero pepper. Just once!

Guy Fieri. What happens when your high school locker partner goes to cooking school...

Mario Batali. Anyone with the balls to wear orange wooden clogs is okay in my book. I remember the "Cooking With Mario" (or whatever it was called) episode where he whips up things at the kitchen counter, with 2-3 people sitting on stools on the other side? Do you remember the female impersonator? I honestly don't think Mario had a clue until about midway through the show. By then, it was too late.

Well; I could go on...but Emeril Live is coming up momentarily. I must prepare.

Doctors and Fax Machines

There's something to be said for the fax machine. Years ago; they were called "telecopiers." You loaded the rotating telecopier drum with special thermal paper, pushed the handset into a rubber cradle and turned the machine on. Within a few minutes, you received a fax. To send a fax, you loaded your original on the rotating drum, dialed a number, put the handset in the rubber cradle and turned on the machine. Within a few minutes, if something didn't crap out in the meantime; your fax was successfully sent.

Fax machines graduated from crude beginnings into slick devices capable of faxing, phoning and printing. Later, HP and other companies started making "all-in-one" printers which doubled as your main printer and also faxed, copied and scanned. Most of us have one. Nowadays, unless it's a color laser, they're cheap and fairly easy to use, if you don't mind the bloatware software that comes with them that attempts to take over your computer, much like Norton.

Problem is; how much do we really fax nowadays? Copies of originals, legal documents, stuff like that. I use efax for most of my faxing, since I GET a lot of faxes as part of my job; press releases, etc. It saves lots of paper and you can just delete what you don't want to keep.

But there's one industry that, to me, stands out head-and-shoulders above all others when it comes to faxing: Medicine.

My long-time doctor is part of a four-physician DC practice that specializes in Internal Medicine and Pulmonology; diseases of the chest. All four doctors are top-shelf; all named in Washingtonian Magazine's list of top doctors.

Over the years; I've found out doctors don't take calls unless you're returning their call. But I have found they're happy to call you back...if you send them a fax! A note with your ailment or question usually gets a response within an hour or so. It may not be from them, personally; perhaps it'll be from one of their staffers, which, many times, is self-defeating. You have to tell the story yet one more time. But at least someone gets in touch with you this way. Leave a message; it might be 2-3 days before someone calls back. You might be dead by then!

Doctors have to have big patient loads to make money these days. Their overhead, by and large, is simply too high. Remember: If you don't care when they call back, leave a message. If you need them right away; send a fax. Illogical, but it works!

Neighbors. 200 Grain Jacketed Hollow-Point. You Decide...

We live in a condo. There are three of us, plus two Maltese, Frosty and Sammy--and two Persians, Heather and Max. Outside of the occasional barking dog, we're pretty quiet and very much to ourselves. On the other hand--some of our neighbors--are not.

Our upstairs neighbor--hereinafter referred to as "Our Neighbor," is probably around 70. She's not all there, if you know what I mean. She's a retired middle school English teacher. Most of the building always thought she was a little odd, but she was always nice to us, albeit a little nosy. When I was hospitalized in November and December; she brought food and asked how I was. She's always volunteered to help bring in our groceries and has always been nice to Nick.

Until recently.

About a month ago; my wife, Michele, was walking our two Maltese. Our Neighbor was outside as well, along with some others from the building. Everyone gathered out on the sidewalk; our doggies hopping up and down on hind legs and yapping. Maltese do that. It's their job.

The moment Michele and the dogs happen on the scene; Our Neighbor says, "why can't you keep your dogs from barking?"

Michele: "They're not barking. They're excited to see you!"

Our Neighbor: "I hate dogs. I don't think they should be allowed in the condos. They bark and crap all over everything. And I thought you just had ONE dog. When did you get the other one? Aren't there rules about that? I wanna talk to Bill about this (Bill--not his real name--is the VP of the condo association). Where's Bill? What's his number?"

Our Neighbor was talking as if she was Miranda Priestly and this was The Devil Wears Prada.

Michele proceeded to try and explain that we were fostering Sammy, but that wasn't good enough for Our Neighbor.

The others in attendance looked at each other and rolled their eyes. One of the others quickly changed the subject--perhaps the weather; I don't know. But when Michele returned from her dog walk; she was livid. She told me what happened. I said I thought Our Neighbor was losing it even more than we thought. Now; Our Neighbor had an Agenda.

A few days later; Michele's out with the dogs--and there's Our Neighbor, hosing down her siding around her front windows. No one elses's siding, mind you. Just her's. Probably about six slats on either side of the windows. This is the same person who parks her car crookedly, crossing over another owner's lines--and ends up falling asleep in the car. We've seen it.

"So--when are you getting rid of that damned dog?"

Michele was stunned. "Well; we haven't decided when we'll get him another home."

Our Neighbor: "I'm gonna bring this up at the next condo board meeting. There's gotta be something in the rules about this. You're not BREEDING those dogs, are you?"

Michele: "No--we don't do that."

Our Neighbor: "Well--you'd better NOT! I KNOW that's against the rules! Know what? I'm gonna call the county, too! If the by-laws don't have something on this--I'm sure the county does."

This--coming from the same woman who, as I said up front, brought food when I was recovering, unsolicited--and helped bring in groceries.

Time out. We checked. The by-laws don't specify number of pets. A call to Loudoun County Animal Control found out two eight pound dogs and two Persian cats in a good home doesn't qualify as a critical animal situation. Later; we talked with the Site Manager, who confirmed that--and said if there was ever a change in those rules; we would be grandfathered and unaffected. She also said the board had basically had it with Our Neighbor for her incessant complaining on everything from pets to the blacktop...and that she would be dealt with once and for all at the meeting.

Usually; we don't go to condo association meetings. Lots of drivel. But, there's a first time for everything--and we made sure we went to this one.

Three days before the meeting; Our Neighbor tapes a typewritten note to our door, reiterating her being at the board meeting and her reasons for doing so. I wrote back, saying I was very disappointed in her demeanor and perhaps something along the lines of a psychiatric evaluation might be in order.

After 30 years of teaching eighth-grade English; it appears Our Neighbor's second career involves changing the world we live in. Remember; the tuning indicator won't stay locked in. She's the kind of person that will say "I can hear radio stations in my head." When you say, "I don't hear anything," she'll get indignant and say, "well, here--just listen!" and open her mouth wide.

Condo meeting day. Our Neighbor, who probably needed a makeover as early as elementary school--shows up in her Sunday Best; makeup troweled on a-la Tammy Fay. She had a manila folder and a digital camera. Everyone else is casual. The condo board was prepped for this, we found out. Apparently; Our Neighbor spends most of her waking hours (and, from what we hear, some of her non-waking hours, too) finding things wrong with our development.

Once the usual condo board business was complete; it was time for "Homeowner's Open Forum." This is where you say things like, "Is it possible to get the burned-out bulbs replaced in the hallway?," or, "there's a boat and trailer in the parking lot that needs to be removed." Our Neighbor used this time to air another laundry list of complaints, including:

--"Swirls" in the parking lot blacktop

--The color of the rubber stair treads in the stairwells

--How the outsourced cleaning service "sits around and does nothing after they've finished cleaning." (condo board response: "maybe they were waiting for their ride...")

--"I just know the tree outside my unit is dead."

Ohhhkay. Then, the board, already prepped for the pet rift, says to Our Neighbor: "We'd like to hear ALL your concerns and complaints RIGHT NOW."

Our Neighbor, not prepared for this sudden burst of hospitality, starts rambling about our dogs and how she thinks our condo is overcrowded and that if we're allowed to do it, everyone will be allowed to do it. The site manager--with witnesses, says there are no rules against a particular number of pets and the board doesn't plan to visit this issue anytime in the forseeable future. There are other things more important.

Tears welled in Our Neighbor's eyes. "FINE!" she said, chastened.

Then, the site manager asked Our Neighbor and us to stay after the meeting, because she wanted to discuss this further. The meeting ended soon after and we approached.

The site manager told Our Neighbor, in no uncertain terms, she was finished with the pet issue. It was done and no further comment would be entertained. Our Neighbor became argumentative--as if how dare the board not address Her Royal Highness's concerns. Then, Our Neighbor told us if we didn't like it there, we should move.

Holy shit.

My wife went ballistic. "We're not the ones with the problem! YOU are!"

The site manager said to Our Neighbor: "What exactly is it that you want?"

In the end; Our Neighbor didn't seem to know.

The condo board president chimed in. "You're not feuding, are you?"

Me: "No. We just want her to leave us alone."

Our Neighbor: "FINE! I will leave you alone FOREVER!"

Me: "Couldn't happen soon enough."

Our Neighbor storms out of the meeting room, fighting back tears. Bitter, lonely, elderly, unloved, unheard. Bad combination.

Outside; we ended up talking to one of our friends who lives next building over. We were kinda in the roadway. We see Our Neighbor backing out of her space. I told Michele and our friend we should step aside, since I thought Our Neighbor would try to run us down. I was nearly right.

Our Neighbor nearly catches rubber speeding away from the scene. She goes into seclusion. Two days later, we see her with multiple suitcases, apparently headed somewhere. Perhaps she has kids she's going to bother for a while. Perhaps she's ISO a retirement community??? My guess she's spending Labor Day week at a Red Roof Inn near Exit 6 on the NJTP, spinning a revolver cylinder.

There's an old saying: "You never know how drunk someone is until the first time you see them sober."

As Rachael Ray might say; "how true is that?"

How Nintendo Wii Has Changed Our Lives (your mileage may vary...)

When my stepson, Nick, now age 10 7/8, wanted a Wii a year ago; we said no. "Buy it yourself," we said, almost in unison. Wiis are expensive. A year ago; there weren't any to be had, anyway. Besides; we thought he should start to understand worth. So; Nick, dutifully, saved his pennies, his holiday money from Nana and Poppy, walked dogs and even stashed his meager allowance; all along dreaming of a Wii. All his friends have Wiis, already--so he's not exactly done without.

A couple weeks ago; we all came to realize Nick had saved over $300. Wiis are $249 at Best Buy, IF they're in stock. But no! Nick had discovered Craigslist! And Nick had found at least half a dozen nearby willing sellers. See; anyone with half a brain KNEW this would happen. The Wii honeymoon ended and kids moved on in life. Anyway; Nick took $200 of his own money; his dad gave him $100 birthday money--and they set off to buy one slightly used but with many extra games and the ever-popular Nunchuk; apparently--a necessity for the hard-core Wii-ers.

Nick and I have spent the last week playing with this thing. I like bowling, golf and baseball. NICK, on the other hand, seems to like playing Super Smash Bros. and Mario. Now, wait a minute. Aren't those GAME CUBE GAMES? Yes, friends--they are. And they play in Wii! That's great--but if you're gonna play Game Cube games all day; what did you buy the Wii for in the first place?

Now we have to sell the Game Cube and the PS2 on Craigslist. Game Cubes are going for about $50...and that's if you have 11 controllers with them. I haven't seen how low PS2s are going for now. I'm not sure if I want to know.

Obama/Biden: Bonafide Ticket--Or Potential Car Dealership?

I'm kinda middle-of-the-road when it comes to politics. Since it's part of my job to cover politics; I can't be very "opinionated," nor have I ever been one to be an "activist."

But the Obama campaign fascinates me. Twenty years ago; Barack Obama would have been laughed at and reduced to eighth on the speaker's list at the Democratic National Convention...if he could get in the building. Now; Obama is poised to possibly become President. I've met him. Nice guy. But there's a certain something about him that tells me he doesn't take crap from anyone. He appears to be a very smart man. He also seems well-equipped to handle the flak he's received and the mini-scandals he's weathered, so far. No doubt the muckraking will escalate after mid-September.

Last night; Obama chose Delaware Senator Joe Biden as his VP running mate. The short list included Indiana Senator Evan Bayh, Virginia Governor Tim Kaine, Connecticut Independent Senator Joe Lieberman (A former VP candidate himself), Illinois Senator Dick Durbin and a few others. Obama made a wise choice. Here's why:

Some will say Biden puts his foot in his mouth. But he's a great communicator; completely at ease--whether he's in a committee meeting or on Fox News Sunday. He is unafraid to shoot from the hip. He is also a major player in U-S foreign policy on Capitol Hill; an issue which could determine who gets elected. Biden is an unabashed opponent of anything Republican, especially George W. Bush. He wasn't too kind to Bush I, either. Biden said the things other Democrats--and, in the end, most Republicans on the Hill--were afraid to say. And he was usually right.

Biden ran for President in 1988. Had his campaign been better organized; he might have made a better showing. And the Biden that ran back then is not the same Biden that's on the ticket, now. It's the old saying about "I wish I were 35 again and know what I know now..."

Biden is now 65; one of the longest-serving members of Congress on either side of the building. He was an-unheard-of 29 when first elected to The Senate in 1972. Delaware is one of the smallest states; not much ground to cover. But Biden has become one of the most powerful lawmakers ever. He seems adept at getting people to side with him with little effort. He has fantastic connections. But he's also not as centrist as Obama, which the Obama campaign probably hopes will completely unbalance anything the GOP throws at it.

But the biggest reason Biden is a good VP choice? If something happens to Obama, it's a good bet Biden would be unafraid to run the nation. I'm not so sure if the others could do the same. Second biggest reason? Obama/Biden has a nice ring to it.

We'll all continue to watch this unfold. I won't speculate who will win. But I've seen a lot worse tickets in my lifetime than Barack Obama/Joe Biden. Wish them luck. They'll need it.