One aspect of getting married at 51 was inheriting a kid. Nicholas turned 11 last week; his birthday party was this past Saturday.
Kids birthday parties in the 'burbs resemble getting Ringling Brothers on the road. Plans for these things start months in advance, much like a wedding. There's the invitation list. The venue. The theme. Getting invited means you're "in the loop." Not getting invited means you must find something else to do with your day. Many kids seriously in the loop sometimes have several parties to go to in a day, much like Hollywood stars.
Then, there's the food and activities. Many parents max out credit cards and take out second mortgages to pay for their child's soiree. This year; we decided to try and keep it on the cheap, but good at the same time. Nick wanted taquitos, tortilla chips and pizza rolls. Off to Sam's Club for institutional-size boxes of taquitos and pizza rolls, plus giant bags of tortilla chips you'll never finish without having a second party. We also got him a giant birthday chocolate chip cookie, because that's what he wanted.
It wasn't enough.
Eleven kids and their parents showed up yesterday. Fortunately; most of the parents left and came back; elated to have some together time. A couple of parents stayed and drank adult beverages. First item on the kids' agenda--nibble on taquitos and tortilla chips--then, play outside.
About 45 minutes later, the little darlings return, hot and sweaty. And hungry. They proceeded to devour the party table of taquitos, pizza rolls and Velveeta dip much the same way as pirhana go after a cow that wanders aimlessly into the Amazon.
It became evident in short order we weren't going to have enough to eat. The taquitos were history and the pizza rolls weren't far behind.
Across the street to Giant for more pizza rolls. Two giant bags later; I return, to find we're now into the birthday present and birthday cookie portion of the show. Apparently, if you tell kids something sweet is on the way; they'll stop eating.
Now; we have two whole bags of pizza rolls plus another half-bag from the feeding frenzy. We also have two huge bags of tortilla chips, another institutional-size brick of Velveeta, plus the melted Velveeta we didn't get to.
Above and beyond all this--the ice maker quit working. So much for the Dreamsicles...
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Monday, September 15, 2008
Mid-Life Crisis. Or, I Got a Gig This Weekend, Dude...
I've spent decades in broadcasting. But I've also spent decades in and out of the music business as a musician.
Radio and music went hand-in-hand for a long, long time. I spent most of grades 9-12 playing in bands and working weekends on the radio somewhere. Guitar was my main instrument; I managed to make very good money playing in a lot of DC-area groups in the 70s. But I also dabbled in reeds (clarinet, alto, tenor, flute) and Hammond B-3 organ. When I was 17; I got a job working Friday-Saturday nights playing solo guitar in between sets at Blues Alley. Huge feather in the cap. No matter it paid just $15 an hour, which was the union rate at the time. Of course; $30 a night went a lot farther then. Fact was--I was suddenly thrust into being able to play with some of the top jazz musicians of the day. I even got mentioned by Felix Grant one night on WMAL! Understand--this was 1972-73--and, when you're a kid and all the planets are aligned; well...
I continued to play through college and into the early 80s. But then, I abruptly gave it up and sold all my equipment. Little things like a '65 ES335; a '59 blond Stratocaster, a vintage 4-10 Bassman amp (perhaps the ultimate guitar amp), plus scads of accessories.
Boy, was that stupid. Had I had some foresight; I would have put those things in temperature-controlled storage!
Been on eBAY lately? My 335 (bought at Chuck Levin's for $300 or so)...would now fetch in the area of $10,000! And my beloved Strat? $15,000 easily! Holy crap! Even the new guitars are going for four figures! The new version of the 335 is over 2 grand. A new, playable Strat is close to that--and that's not even the same-quality guitar made back in the day! Hell; the guy who used to WORK on my guitars, Paul Reed Smith (who was a guitar tech at Chuck Levin's before striking out on his own), is making a fortune selling better-quality guitars than Fender or Gibson. It's said "it's not the guitar; it's the player." But those PRS guitars are wonderful.
Okay. Fast-forward to today. One of the stations I do news for from home for is having a big event this coming Sunday. The Fabulous Hubcaps are headlining. This is a great local band; guys who get AARP and are still going strong! Most I know from years and bands past. But also on the bill is a band made up of guys who work at the station! Turns out we all used to play for a living; a couple still do--so the plan was launched.
Thursday; I'll pack the Hammond XK3 keyboard I play nowadays and truck up to the other side of the Chesapeake Bay and we'll start practicing. We need 20 songs for Sunday's two one-hour sets. We won't get a dime for it; in fact...we might have to pay THEM! But the fun we'll have will outweigh any hassle. We're expecting to have lots of fun with The Hubcaps...and we're also expecting to relive some memories we all thought would go by the wayside.
It must be Reunion Week. Broadcasting last week; music this week. What's next?
Cross your fingers we don't suck. Some of those "memories" may come back slower than others!
Radio and music went hand-in-hand for a long, long time. I spent most of grades 9-12 playing in bands and working weekends on the radio somewhere. Guitar was my main instrument; I managed to make very good money playing in a lot of DC-area groups in the 70s. But I also dabbled in reeds (clarinet, alto, tenor, flute) and Hammond B-3 organ. When I was 17; I got a job working Friday-Saturday nights playing solo guitar in between sets at Blues Alley. Huge feather in the cap. No matter it paid just $15 an hour, which was the union rate at the time. Of course; $30 a night went a lot farther then. Fact was--I was suddenly thrust into being able to play with some of the top jazz musicians of the day. I even got mentioned by Felix Grant one night on WMAL! Understand--this was 1972-73--and, when you're a kid and all the planets are aligned; well...
I continued to play through college and into the early 80s. But then, I abruptly gave it up and sold all my equipment. Little things like a '65 ES335; a '59 blond Stratocaster, a vintage 4-10 Bassman amp (perhaps the ultimate guitar amp), plus scads of accessories.
Boy, was that stupid. Had I had some foresight; I would have put those things in temperature-controlled storage!
Been on eBAY lately? My 335 (bought at Chuck Levin's for $300 or so)...would now fetch in the area of $10,000! And my beloved Strat? $15,000 easily! Holy crap! Even the new guitars are going for four figures! The new version of the 335 is over 2 grand. A new, playable Strat is close to that--and that's not even the same-quality guitar made back in the day! Hell; the guy who used to WORK on my guitars, Paul Reed Smith (who was a guitar tech at Chuck Levin's before striking out on his own), is making a fortune selling better-quality guitars than Fender or Gibson. It's said "it's not the guitar; it's the player." But those PRS guitars are wonderful.
Okay. Fast-forward to today. One of the stations I do news for from home for is having a big event this coming Sunday. The Fabulous Hubcaps are headlining. This is a great local band; guys who get AARP and are still going strong! Most I know from years and bands past. But also on the bill is a band made up of guys who work at the station! Turns out we all used to play for a living; a couple still do--so the plan was launched.
Thursday; I'll pack the Hammond XK3 keyboard I play nowadays and truck up to the other side of the Chesapeake Bay and we'll start practicing. We need 20 songs for Sunday's two one-hour sets. We won't get a dime for it; in fact...we might have to pay THEM! But the fun we'll have will outweigh any hassle. We're expecting to have lots of fun with The Hubcaps...and we're also expecting to relive some memories we all thought would go by the wayside.
It must be Reunion Week. Broadcasting last week; music this week. What's next?
Cross your fingers we don't suck. Some of those "memories" may come back slower than others!
Saturday, September 13, 2008
MBS/NBC Radio 10-Year Reunion
I love it when a plan comes together.
Showing up at Saturday night's Mutual/NBC Radio reunion was almost like going to the MBS/NBC Christmas Party back in the day. For a lot of us; reconnecting was almost like not having to reconnect at all. Many of us had stayed in touch over the years; some of us had worked together again since the two networks were ousted from Crystal City in August, 1998. Some people weren't there because they were working and couldn't get off. Others weren't there because they weren't with us anymore. Regardless; everyone who was there had a great time. Lots of memories. Lots of inside stuff that spouses and outsiders who aren't in the business don't understand:
--Jim Bohannon was the perfect MC, as he always is.
--Bob Edwards read the "Mutual" chapter from his soon-to-be-released memoirs. It pretty much put the entire network in perspective. It also told the saga of C. Edward Little; legendary now...at least to the Geezers. The youngins don't understand what that era was all about.
--Dan Scanlan was moved to tears.
--Yours Truly played and commented on the last-ever MBS cast from Crystal City.
--John Henrehan told his Tom O'Brien story which, if you had ever worked with Tom, hit everything on the head. Everyone who worked there in the Bopper Era has a Tom O'Brien story.
--Dick Rosse, who may actually look younger than ten years ago, read a poem he wrote for the occasion.
--Paul Anthony played the "Laff and Gaffe" blooper reels, with commentary in between each cut. Sad they didn't have the one with Tony Marvin, obviously schnockered, completely butchering a "The World Today" newscast when the sponsor's executives were in a listening room in Minneapolis. Tony got two weeks off for that one. Anyone else (at the time) would have been permanently jettisoned from the industry.
--Marty Davis was stunning, as usual. She shot the video and it'll be on YouTube shortly.
--Bart Tessler, our boss at the end, showed up for the cocktail gathering, then, left.
--Phil Alexiou liked the salmon.
--I would have walked right by Rob Schaefer on the street. Glad I saw his name tag lol!
--Cara Fogarty and husband John Stempin couldn't make it at the last minute. Sad, since Cara was a good friend to all of us.
--Pat McDougall brought her mega-expensive Canon digital SLR and got lots of candids.
--Pat O'Donnell (Wash/Balt AFTRA Exec Secretary) sat at the front table. I hoped they comped her ticket. Pat's efforts in 1997 kept our salaries, severance and benefits intact. If it weren't for Pat; we would've gotten about $37.50 when we left. Pat's now-late husband, Tom Powers, was the AFTRA local counsel for years. He, too, was remembered fondly. He was just as instrumental in getting that contract as Pat was. Pat would probably say even more so than her.
--Where was Dean Everette? How could we have a party without Dean?
--We remembered Fred Lowery. We all wish Fred could have been there. Perhaps he was, anyway. We also remembered Kurt Henschen. He was probably there in spirit, too.
Jill "I Need A Job" Nado and Rita Rich did a helluva job of putting this thing together.
Reunions don't mean much except to those who attend them. But we had close to 100 people show up for an event where Jill was hoping just to break even with 50-60. There were others who couldn't come that night who wanted to; others were conspicuously absent. I know one thing: The 12th floor of 1755 Jeff Davis Highway--as screwed up as it was--was home for a lot of us in more ways than "just a job." When we left 8/31/98, severance checks in hand; we left a piece of ourselves in that building. Perhaps that's why so many of us showed up Saturday night. We may have moved on in jobs and careers, but will always remember the toil to put together a product that, despite the limitations--was many times better than the rest.
Showing up at Saturday night's Mutual/NBC Radio reunion was almost like going to the MBS/NBC Christmas Party back in the day. For a lot of us; reconnecting was almost like not having to reconnect at all. Many of us had stayed in touch over the years; some of us had worked together again since the two networks were ousted from Crystal City in August, 1998. Some people weren't there because they were working and couldn't get off. Others weren't there because they weren't with us anymore. Regardless; everyone who was there had a great time. Lots of memories. Lots of inside stuff that spouses and outsiders who aren't in the business don't understand:
--Jim Bohannon was the perfect MC, as he always is.
--Bob Edwards read the "Mutual" chapter from his soon-to-be-released memoirs. It pretty much put the entire network in perspective. It also told the saga of C. Edward Little; legendary now...at least to the Geezers. The youngins don't understand what that era was all about.
--Dan Scanlan was moved to tears.
--Yours Truly played and commented on the last-ever MBS cast from Crystal City.
--John Henrehan told his Tom O'Brien story which, if you had ever worked with Tom, hit everything on the head. Everyone who worked there in the Bopper Era has a Tom O'Brien story.
--Dick Rosse, who may actually look younger than ten years ago, read a poem he wrote for the occasion.
--Paul Anthony played the "Laff and Gaffe" blooper reels, with commentary in between each cut. Sad they didn't have the one with Tony Marvin, obviously schnockered, completely butchering a "The World Today" newscast when the sponsor's executives were in a listening room in Minneapolis. Tony got two weeks off for that one. Anyone else (at the time) would have been permanently jettisoned from the industry.
--Marty Davis was stunning, as usual. She shot the video and it'll be on YouTube shortly.
--Bart Tessler, our boss at the end, showed up for the cocktail gathering, then, left.
--Phil Alexiou liked the salmon.
--I would have walked right by Rob Schaefer on the street. Glad I saw his name tag lol!
--Cara Fogarty and husband John Stempin couldn't make it at the last minute. Sad, since Cara was a good friend to all of us.
--Pat McDougall brought her mega-expensive Canon digital SLR and got lots of candids.
--Pat O'Donnell (Wash/Balt AFTRA Exec Secretary) sat at the front table. I hoped they comped her ticket. Pat's efforts in 1997 kept our salaries, severance and benefits intact. If it weren't for Pat; we would've gotten about $37.50 when we left. Pat's now-late husband, Tom Powers, was the AFTRA local counsel for years. He, too, was remembered fondly. He was just as instrumental in getting that contract as Pat was. Pat would probably say even more so than her.
--Where was Dean Everette? How could we have a party without Dean?
--We remembered Fred Lowery. We all wish Fred could have been there. Perhaps he was, anyway. We also remembered Kurt Henschen. He was probably there in spirit, too.
Jill "I Need A Job" Nado and Rita Rich did a helluva job of putting this thing together.
Reunions don't mean much except to those who attend them. But we had close to 100 people show up for an event where Jill was hoping just to break even with 50-60. There were others who couldn't come that night who wanted to; others were conspicuously absent. I know one thing: The 12th floor of 1755 Jeff Davis Highway--as screwed up as it was--was home for a lot of us in more ways than "just a job." When we left 8/31/98, severance checks in hand; we left a piece of ourselves in that building. Perhaps that's why so many of us showed up Saturday night. We may have moved on in jobs and careers, but will always remember the toil to put together a product that, despite the limitations--was many times better than the rest.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Welcome Back Spam!
Last Friday; Virginia's Supreme Court declared the state's anti-spam law unconstitutional. At the same time; it overturned the conviction of Jeremy Jaynes, considered one of the world's biggest spammers. Jaynes got nine years for sending billions of spam emails worldwide...lots of them for things like "Cialis Soft-Tabs," "Chewable Viagra" and other things anyone with half a brain just knows aren't true. Jaynes was allowed to stay out of jail pending appeals.
And it looks like he'll be staying out of jail for a long time to come.
Jaynes made a fortune before being convicted and sentenced...apparently, enough money to hire great attorneys who kept his case in various courts until Friday's ruling. Although his case could conceivably go through federal appeals courts and, eventually, to the U-S Supreme Court; it appears Jeremy has won.
Virginia Attorney General Bob McDonnell says he'll take it to the U-S Supreme Court; says he's "very disappointed" in Friday's ruling. But, it's an election year--and it looks like McDonnell's going to run for Governor next year--so...
Two questions: What will this do to anti-spam laws in other states? When will Jeremy start spamming again?
Other states have similar anti-spam laws, but they haven't really been tested. Will Jaynes become the poster child for spam--and will his attorneys file in other states to have those laws overturned, too? Probably.
If Jeremy has any of his fortune left--and he probably does--it will take him about five minutes to find a provider and start spamming again. There are plenty of ISPs that will take his money and set up a corner of the server room just for him.
Ten years ago--back in the Windows 95 and 98 days--we got spammed plenty. Go on your computer at 7:30 am and watch the inbox flow! One email for me; 150 spam. It was a real pain in the ass. Some people still get a lot of spam. But, for the most part; the industry--and computer users--grew a brain and figured out how to limit or eliminate it. Nowadays; I get maybe one a day that seeps through. Any other "direct emails" usually come from online merchants or services I've chosen to get emails from.
But spam is still a big problem. By and large; computer users (read: all of us) really don't want it unless we ask for it. Perhaps the original anti-spam laws were written wrong? If spam is now truly protected under the First Amendment; how about new laws that severely punish spammers if they continue to send emails to those on a "do not spam" list? It's worked in telemarketing, although more and more on the "do not call" list seem to be falling through the cracks.
Treat the disease, not the symptoms.
I, too, am disappointed at Friday's state Supreme Court ruling. I'm getting my inbox ready as I write...
And it looks like he'll be staying out of jail for a long time to come.
Jaynes made a fortune before being convicted and sentenced...apparently, enough money to hire great attorneys who kept his case in various courts until Friday's ruling. Although his case could conceivably go through federal appeals courts and, eventually, to the U-S Supreme Court; it appears Jeremy has won.
Virginia Attorney General Bob McDonnell says he'll take it to the U-S Supreme Court; says he's "very disappointed" in Friday's ruling. But, it's an election year--and it looks like McDonnell's going to run for Governor next year--so...
Two questions: What will this do to anti-spam laws in other states? When will Jeremy start spamming again?
Other states have similar anti-spam laws, but they haven't really been tested. Will Jaynes become the poster child for spam--and will his attorneys file in other states to have those laws overturned, too? Probably.
If Jeremy has any of his fortune left--and he probably does--it will take him about five minutes to find a provider and start spamming again. There are plenty of ISPs that will take his money and set up a corner of the server room just for him.
Ten years ago--back in the Windows 95 and 98 days--we got spammed plenty. Go on your computer at 7:30 am and watch the inbox flow! One email for me; 150 spam. It was a real pain in the ass. Some people still get a lot of spam. But, for the most part; the industry--and computer users--grew a brain and figured out how to limit or eliminate it. Nowadays; I get maybe one a day that seeps through. Any other "direct emails" usually come from online merchants or services I've chosen to get emails from.
But spam is still a big problem. By and large; computer users (read: all of us) really don't want it unless we ask for it. Perhaps the original anti-spam laws were written wrong? If spam is now truly protected under the First Amendment; how about new laws that severely punish spammers if they continue to send emails to those on a "do not spam" list? It's worked in telemarketing, although more and more on the "do not call" list seem to be falling through the cracks.
Treat the disease, not the symptoms.
I, too, am disappointed at Friday's state Supreme Court ruling. I'm getting my inbox ready as I write...
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Don Lafontaine
Anyone who's cracked a mic as a voiceover talent in our generation knows the name Don Lafontaine. Don was to voiceovers what Itzak Pearlman is to the violin. Trailers for over 5,000 movies; hundreds of thousands of commercials. Millions in net worth. He invented a whole new way of doing things.
Don Lafontaine died yesterday, Labor Day, of complications from pneumothorax. In a nutshell; he was admitted to Cedars-Sinai for shortness of breath. Turned out it was a collapsed lung. And, a blood clot. Word is the clot moved elsewhere after the lung was reinflated and that was pretty much that. Don Lafontaine was 68.
Very sad. On top of being the most-prolific and highest-paid voiceover talent in the Universe; Don Lafontaine was also one of the nicest guys in the business. As much money as Don Lafontaine made; he may have been equally responsible for mentoring others and launching their careers. He was a big ham; unafraid to parody himself or the business that made him so much money. The Geico TV spot with him is one example--but I think of others you can find on YouTube if you search with his name. The limo ride to the awards show (Five Guys In A Limo) is classic.
Once the funeral's done and the grieving subsides--one thing is certain: Life goes on. And in the 15-minutes-of-fame voiceover business--no doubt half the talent in L.A. will be on the phone with The Tisherman Agency or ICM this time next week. Don did so much work--it might take several people to take care of his schedule. My A-List guesses for his replacement:
--George DelHoyo
--Ben Patrick Johnson
--Andy Geller
--And, of course--Hal Douglas
--And here's a long shot: Comedian Pablo Francisco--who does an uncanny imitation of Don Lafontaine. Could he get into character for a couple million a year? I could...
God bless Don Lafontaine. He changed the industry and gave an entire generation of viewers and listeners a voice they'll always remember.
Don Lafontaine died yesterday, Labor Day, of complications from pneumothorax. In a nutshell; he was admitted to Cedars-Sinai for shortness of breath. Turned out it was a collapsed lung. And, a blood clot. Word is the clot moved elsewhere after the lung was reinflated and that was pretty much that. Don Lafontaine was 68.
Very sad. On top of being the most-prolific and highest-paid voiceover talent in the Universe; Don Lafontaine was also one of the nicest guys in the business. As much money as Don Lafontaine made; he may have been equally responsible for mentoring others and launching their careers. He was a big ham; unafraid to parody himself or the business that made him so much money. The Geico TV spot with him is one example--but I think of others you can find on YouTube if you search with his name. The limo ride to the awards show (Five Guys In A Limo) is classic.
Once the funeral's done and the grieving subsides--one thing is certain: Life goes on. And in the 15-minutes-of-fame voiceover business--no doubt half the talent in L.A. will be on the phone with The Tisherman Agency or ICM this time next week. Don did so much work--it might take several people to take care of his schedule. My A-List guesses for his replacement:
--George DelHoyo
--Ben Patrick Johnson
--Andy Geller
--And, of course--Hal Douglas
--And here's a long shot: Comedian Pablo Francisco--who does an uncanny imitation of Don Lafontaine. Could he get into character for a couple million a year? I could...
God bless Don Lafontaine. He changed the industry and gave an entire generation of viewers and listeners a voice they'll always remember.
Monday, September 1, 2008
School Days
Our family is about to enter a new phase: Middle School.
When Michele and I first met; she was going through a very bad divorce and I was coming off a very disappointing relationship. We wouldn't date for several more years. That's for another piece. But I remember, when we were introduced and met to chat the first time--her adorable son, Nicholas. He was about four at the time. Always smiling; always easy to make laugh. And always laughing. Until I got married, I was never much into kids, although I thought it would be novel to have one of my own. But Nick seemed to be a great template for the imaginary "ideal kid."
In an earlier blog; I discussed Nick's finally acquiring a Nintendo Wii. Tuesday; Nick puts the Wii on the back burner and heads off to an experience he'll hopefully remember longer than the Wii: Farmwell Station Middle School.
As anyone at the top end of the 45-54 demo like I am can attest; school is different these days. I can't relate. For me, public school was K-6, then 7-9, then 10-12. I vividly remember the first day of seventh grade. We didn't have "orientation" or an Ice Cream Social, where parents ate ice cream and waited patiently for their darlings to finish their tour, get their class schedules, meet their teachers , buy Spirit Wear and try out their locker combinations. We, on the other hand, got our class schedules sometime in July, in a little 3/4 size envelope, printed out on a grid on one of those old mainframe data printers. We simply showed up at our new school the day after Labor Day and fended for ourselves. And everyone was thrown in the mix together. We feared getting "rooked," where 8th and 9th graders would try to mark your face or clothing with lipstick. Or, getting "froot looped," which is where someone would yank the hang loop off the back of your shirt, effectively ruining it, since the hang loop was sewn into the shoulder pleat just below the collar. If you haven't guessed by now; this was the 60s. We wore Bass Weejuns, Peters golf jackets, wore Canterbury belts and carried Canterbury wallets. We were preppy but didn't know it. We didn't have Abercrombie or Old Navy. We had The Varsity Shop.
Nowadays; middle school starts in sixth grade. Sorry, but that's way too young. The administrator who made that decision should be shot. To me, every phase of public school needs a point where the student becomes the big fish in the pond. Sixth grade for elementary; 9th grade for junior high and 12th grade for high school. These are tried-and-true transitional ages. I just don't think sixth graders are necessarily ready for the rigors of large-scale social interaction. That includes culture shocks like fighting, first day in the locker room and missing the bus when you live eight miles away.
Oops. I spoke too soon. Lots has happened since 1966-1970, when I went to middle school. Kids don't worry about getting in a playground scrap nowadays. They worry about being gunned down because the kid sitting next to them brought their dad's Glock 40 for a nouveau version of Show and Tell. Girls don't just worry about menstrual cramps and why boys suddenly like them. They worry Justin will be at Amber's party next Friday night while her parents are away. Not that they don't like Justin, but Justin's presence might mean sudden parenthood. Whether they like it or not.
Geez. Remember when the norm was "let's not and say we did?" Okay. perhaps that's why middle school now starts in sixth grade. Perhaps this is why kids are now in a more-structured setting at an earlier age. Sex, drugs, guns, gangs. Fashion. Peer pressure. It gets younger and younger.
That's really sad.
As you get older; you realize there's a time and place for everything. And as you look back on your life; you realize losing one's innocence wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Fun at the time? Maybe. But how you'd love to have those couple of years back now...
These days; middle school is highly-structured and highly-specialized. Gone are the six or seven period days. Now; it's four 90 minute blocks, with different classes on alternating days. Kinda like college. And the school resembles prison. No bars, but each grade is, for the most part, sequestered in their own "house." No more "lunch buddies." Each homeroom must eat lunch together. There is little if any cross-socialization.
Remember the first time you saw a boy and girl holding hands, walking down the hall? I don't know about Farmwell, but in other schools, such PDA today will get you suspended, if not expelled. Same for horseplay or even a scuffle that gets broken up before it escalates. Text your friend in History class and get caught? You'll need an attorney.
All this in mind; we've tried to get Nick to realize he's not the only one going through this tomorrow. Millions of kids nationwide will take the next step toward adulthood. He's psyched, too. Already has his bookbag packed with the requisite school supplies. Now, if he can just get through the next 23 hours...
I hope Nick remembers middle school as a positive experience. Eighth grade is usually the worst, transitionally. But, in reality; they all are. All we can do, as parents, is make sure Nick knows right from wrong, support him unconditionally and point him in the right direction. And, wish we were his age again--and know what we know now...
When Michele and I first met; she was going through a very bad divorce and I was coming off a very disappointing relationship. We wouldn't date for several more years. That's for another piece. But I remember, when we were introduced and met to chat the first time--her adorable son, Nicholas. He was about four at the time. Always smiling; always easy to make laugh. And always laughing. Until I got married, I was never much into kids, although I thought it would be novel to have one of my own. But Nick seemed to be a great template for the imaginary "ideal kid."
In an earlier blog; I discussed Nick's finally acquiring a Nintendo Wii. Tuesday; Nick puts the Wii on the back burner and heads off to an experience he'll hopefully remember longer than the Wii: Farmwell Station Middle School.
As anyone at the top end of the 45-54 demo like I am can attest; school is different these days. I can't relate. For me, public school was K-6, then 7-9, then 10-12. I vividly remember the first day of seventh grade. We didn't have "orientation" or an Ice Cream Social, where parents ate ice cream and waited patiently for their darlings to finish their tour, get their class schedules, meet their teachers , buy Spirit Wear and try out their locker combinations. We, on the other hand, got our class schedules sometime in July, in a little 3/4 size envelope, printed out on a grid on one of those old mainframe data printers. We simply showed up at our new school the day after Labor Day and fended for ourselves. And everyone was thrown in the mix together. We feared getting "rooked," where 8th and 9th graders would try to mark your face or clothing with lipstick. Or, getting "froot looped," which is where someone would yank the hang loop off the back of your shirt, effectively ruining it, since the hang loop was sewn into the shoulder pleat just below the collar. If you haven't guessed by now; this was the 60s. We wore Bass Weejuns, Peters golf jackets, wore Canterbury belts and carried Canterbury wallets. We were preppy but didn't know it. We didn't have Abercrombie or Old Navy. We had The Varsity Shop.
Nowadays; middle school starts in sixth grade. Sorry, but that's way too young. The administrator who made that decision should be shot. To me, every phase of public school needs a point where the student becomes the big fish in the pond. Sixth grade for elementary; 9th grade for junior high and 12th grade for high school. These are tried-and-true transitional ages. I just don't think sixth graders are necessarily ready for the rigors of large-scale social interaction. That includes culture shocks like fighting, first day in the locker room and missing the bus when you live eight miles away.
Oops. I spoke too soon. Lots has happened since 1966-1970, when I went to middle school. Kids don't worry about getting in a playground scrap nowadays. They worry about being gunned down because the kid sitting next to them brought their dad's Glock 40 for a nouveau version of Show and Tell. Girls don't just worry about menstrual cramps and why boys suddenly like them. They worry Justin will be at Amber's party next Friday night while her parents are away. Not that they don't like Justin, but Justin's presence might mean sudden parenthood. Whether they like it or not.
Geez. Remember when the norm was "let's not and say we did?" Okay. perhaps that's why middle school now starts in sixth grade. Perhaps this is why kids are now in a more-structured setting at an earlier age. Sex, drugs, guns, gangs. Fashion. Peer pressure. It gets younger and younger.
That's really sad.
As you get older; you realize there's a time and place for everything. And as you look back on your life; you realize losing one's innocence wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Fun at the time? Maybe. But how you'd love to have those couple of years back now...
These days; middle school is highly-structured and highly-specialized. Gone are the six or seven period days. Now; it's four 90 minute blocks, with different classes on alternating days. Kinda like college. And the school resembles prison. No bars, but each grade is, for the most part, sequestered in their own "house." No more "lunch buddies." Each homeroom must eat lunch together. There is little if any cross-socialization.
Remember the first time you saw a boy and girl holding hands, walking down the hall? I don't know about Farmwell, but in other schools, such PDA today will get you suspended, if not expelled. Same for horseplay or even a scuffle that gets broken up before it escalates. Text your friend in History class and get caught? You'll need an attorney.
All this in mind; we've tried to get Nick to realize he's not the only one going through this tomorrow. Millions of kids nationwide will take the next step toward adulthood. He's psyched, too. Already has his bookbag packed with the requisite school supplies. Now, if he can just get through the next 23 hours...
I hope Nick remembers middle school as a positive experience. Eighth grade is usually the worst, transitionally. But, in reality; they all are. All we can do, as parents, is make sure Nick knows right from wrong, support him unconditionally and point him in the right direction. And, wish we were his age again--and know what we know now...
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